Phil Kanes Mythical creatures

La Succion (La Ventosa)

This dangerous creature is a remorseless hunter, gorging itself nightly on the unwary.

La Succion – or as it is known in Italy, La Ventosa – lurks in the narrow passageways that are threaded, like veins, through the heart of every old European city. It is a particularly horrific predator because, unlike most, it is not motivated by hunger alone, but relishes the chase, the cruel and relentless pursuit of its human prey.

La Succion is distinguished by its most grotesque and repugnant feature; its entire head is one large sucking mouth. Other than this, its body is essentially humanoid in its shape and features, although it is equipped with the savage claws of a raptor.

Current theory holds that La Succion detects human victims through the taste of their scent molecules carried on the air, and during the actual pursuit through the strong and spicy taste of their fear.

When it finally grows bored with the chase, La Succion leaps upon its prey and, tearing open the flesh in one swift movement, proceeds to suck out through the wound the internal organs of the still living victim.

Medway beaver

"For I pray God for the introduction of new creatures into this island.
For I pray God for the ostriches of Salisbury Plain, the beavers of the Medway and silver fish of Thames.
For Charity is cold in the multitude of possessions, and the rich are covetous of their crumbs."
Christopher Smart, Jubilate Agno, written between 1758-63.

These creatures, in spite of the name by which they are so commonly known, are in fact entirely unrelated to the beaver. They are often to be seen in the area of the Medway Towns, in North Kent, perhaps basking on a convenient roof. When Christopher Smart was writing Jubilate Agno, they were familiar inhabitants of the bustling Royal Dockyard at Chatham.

The so-called “Medway beaver” is always black in colour, and can grow to around the size of a badger. Its most notable feature is a coat of retractable spikes, presumably intended for self-protection. Unless faced with an immediate threat, however, these spikes will normally remain hidden, retracted beneath the black fur; in which state the “Medway beaver” is easily mistaken for a large black cat.

Their favoured habitat, as their name suggests, is in or near to water. But they have made their way considerably inland over time. Each family builds a nest consisting of a network of tunnels, covered over with branches, twigs and leaves that can eventually form a small mound, a little similar in appearance to the beavers’ dam.

Today, there is said to be quite a strong colony of “Medway beavers” nesting within the environs of Fort Amherst, a partially-restored Napoleonic fortress in Chatham, very close to their ancient territories in the now-defunct Naval Dockyard

Aphids of Venus

These tiny insects, coloured a vivid red, are fatally attracted to the perspiration of lovers. They exude a sweet, sticky secretion by means of which they can attach themselves firmly to bare skin. Whereupon they gorge themselves on beads of lovers’ sweat during the course of the sexual act, until they swell to three or four times their normal size and eventually burst, dying instantly.

Their favoured habitats are grassy fields, and beds of meadowsweet. The Aphids of Venus are barely visible to the naked human eye, and in fact were only discovered following the invention of the microscope during the 1590’s. Some theories suggest that they may be drawn to the copulation of animals as much and as easily as to that of humans. However, this remains a minority view.

The Aphids of Venus were first described by Dr. Melchizedek Ganderbane, who wrote about them in his pamphlet The Passion of Mother Nature, published sometime during 1647. Ganderbane argued that their strange behaviour is driven by a surfeit of desire; though further research has neither been able to confirm this hypothesis nor to provide clear evidence for any alternative theory.